Will God always save the day? In the last two years and three months, I have watched my family crumble.
I am faced with the faith-shaking truth that, frequently, following God is ferociously difficult. You see, we were called to adopt teens out of foster care and the consequences of that action on our four biological daughters and on our extended family have been huge.
When we stepped out in faith and brought our new daughters into our home, we introduced a level of darkness caused by their past that we never could have imagined.
And this isn’t the first time I’ve experienced this type of reward in exchange for obedience. The last time I set out on a major faith-walk, moving across an ocean and leaving my island paradise to home-school my children in the desert, I was rewarded with the four toughest years of my life.
Four years battling my demons, isolated in a desert. Four years of constant tears, and curling up in the fetal position, and overwhelming sorrow. Four years of wondering if I had heard God correctly.
But I learned so many lessons in that desert. Learned to press into the Lord faithfully. Learned that all I needed was him. Learned that the stars are brightest when the sky is darkest. I eventually got to experience the sweet fruit of faithfulness. You’d think, though, that the experience would have also taught me stepping out in faith doesn’t result in easy strolls though fragrant meadows but rather, navigating through impossible situations where, when it all works out, all we can do is gasp, “That could only have been God.”
The battles that have come along with fostering have left me disheartened and questioning God again.
Did I really hear you correctly, Daddy?
Before you scold me for being melodramatic, it isn’t just me. Scripture shows putting obedient followers into impossible situations to be a favorite move of the God we love and serve.
Shadrach, Meshach and Abed-nego obeyed God, bowing down to no one but him. Yet they weren’t rescued before being thrown into the fire for their faithfulness. They had to endure first.
Moses believed God at that burning bush and changed his whole life, only to be met with constant opposition from the most powerful man in the world at the time, and culminating in a fierce chariot riding army bearing down on him before a seemingly impassable red sea.
David and Daniel. Elijah and Esther. Joseph and Job. Scripture is bursting with faithful servants of God who, as a direct result of their obedience, experienced bleak outlooks, painful realities, and impossible odds.
And in our favorite stories, God steps in at the last moment to save the day. The red seas part, the bread multiples, the plot is uncovered, the lion’s mouth is closed. Shadrach, Meshach and Abed-nego emerge from the flames, unscathed! The hero overcomes!
But there are times, friend, there are times when he does not. When faithful servants were obedient and they were not rescued. When, by any human standard, it did not work out in the end. John died in jail. Steven was stoned. Lot lost his home and his wife. Moses never got to enter that promised land. Jesus himself, faithful and obedient every moment of every day of his life, died on the cross in agony and the world went dark.
And the thing is, I don’t know which kind of story this is going to be. Right now, I’m wading so deep through broken. There has been division and there has been destruction. We are watching our six kids struggle and suffer and for most of them, run from God. I do not know if we will see redemption for my daughters.
There is no guarantee that God will step in and save the day. Frighteningly, as scripture demonstrates, he might… but then again, he might not.
We may not ever know why we were asked to do this, at least not this side of heaven. Yet, I have to trust that God knows what he is doing, even when things don’t seem to work out.
My prayer is that God restores this family. I know he can. But even if He doesn’t… may we continue to love and serve him.
…our God whom we serve is able to rescue us from the furnace of blazing fire; and He will rescue us from your hand, O king. But even if He does not, let it be known to you, O king, that we are not going to serve your gods nor worship the golden statue that you have set up. (Daniel 3: 17b-18, NASB)
Some people always seem to learn things the hard way, and I am one of them. My life is just another God tale of beauty for ashes. I blog about what I have learned with the hope that someone else can learn through my mistakes without having to walk down a bumpy road themselves. Visit my blog or follow my social media!
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