God’s Honor: Appreciating Our Handpicked Role in the Kingdom

Every Friday, several international people from our church meet for prayer, Bible study, and fellowship. It is a group that I have grown to love and am very grateful for.

It was in that setting last year that a guest speaker asked us all if we could share something positive about the person sitting to our right. In the course of the evening, the atmosphere became very emotionally charged. Many of us were in tears. Paulsam, my husband, was at my right and I had the privilege of speaking wonderful things about him – every word I knew to be true.

After the time of appreciation was up, we had a time of thanking God. Paulsam started to pray and cried for the first time that evening (or for the first time since we’d been a part of the homegroup, for that matter). He told God that all the wonderful things that I’d said about him would never have been possible without His touch in his life.

Now, I knew Paulsam before he had made the decision to live as a disciple of Christ and I knew that every word he prayed was true. I got to witness first-hand, the radical change that God can bring in a man completely surrendered to Him.

However, sometime during that prayer, the pride in me reared its ugly head. I began to think to myself, it is only ever me telling everyone that Paulsam is so wonderful. I don’t remember him telling anyone even once that I am a good wife or anything of that sort.

At that point, we’d been married for over four years. I knew the man that I had married. He’s deeply appreciative of me and lets me know exactly how he feels. However, he’s a rather private person and public displays of affection don’t sit very well with him. However, on that day, despite knowing all this, it got to me. I put up a brave front sitting there while I wrestled with my negative emotions. Quietly, I sent up desperate cries from my heart to heaven to deliver me from the temptation to succumb to anger and bitterness.

Enter Jesus.

The Lord graciously reminded me of a verse that dealt with my situation. I’d read and marked that verse only the week before in my Bible, and here God was – giving me an opportunity to put it into practice and grow in Him. John 5:34 came to mind:

…I do not receive testimony from man.

And verse 41, which simply states:

I do not receive honor from men.

It continues to verse 44, which asks a very pointed question – How can you believe, when you receive honor from one another, and do not seek the honor that comes from the only God?

Sitting among friends at the dining table, with no one having a clue to my inner turmoil, the Lord began to show me all the ways in which I compared myself to my husband. When God spoke to him through a dream, I was disappointed that I didn’t get one. If his prayer life was growing, I tried to pray more – but with all the wrong motives.

I was aware that these were all unacceptable attitudes in a Christian and that God could not be pleased with a heart that did not celebrate witnessing the growth of others. Tenderly, but in no uncertain terms, God showed me that there was a bigger problem to be dealt with.

Jealousy.

In the next couple days, the Lord graciously led me to passages in Scripture that shed light on the issues I was dealing with. In John 21:22, Peter decides to be nosy – perhaps bordering on jealous – and asks the risen Lord about His plans for John. This is right after the Lord reveals to Peter that he is to “feed” and “tend” His sheep.

Peter also knew that he was the rock on which the Lord would build His church upon and “the gates of hell shall not prevail against it” (Matthew 16:18). He was also given the keys to the Kingdom of Heaven. I mean, what an honor! Anyway, Peter now wants to know what the Lord’s plans for John are. The Lord replies by saying, “If it is my will that he remain until I come, what is that to you? You follow me!” (John 21:22)

I am comforted to know that the Lord chooses us individually. He handpicks us for different jobs in the Kingdom. That’s why it is called the body of Christ. Those who disregard the function of their little toe would have a rather unpleasant shock if they found it gone. I thank God that I am called to only do my part for His kingdom.

On some days, I might not consider my part to be as “great” as someone else for whom I have high regard, but if I do everything that the Lord has called me to do, that is enough for me. I can rest in the knowledge that I have done my best with what was entrusted to me.

The Lord will not ask me to give an account for every soul in the world or ask me why I did not hold crusades and lead a million to Him. If His plan for me is to raise the children that He has given me, do my part in the local church, and write to encourage others, I will be content. Yes, I will even rejoice.

My Prayer

Dear Father, please help me. I do not want to be focused on the things that I see other people do for You and feel inadequate. Just as You told Peter, I want to follow You and I want to run with endurance the race that is set before me, looking unto Jesus the Author and Finisher of my faith (Hebrews 12:1-2).

I don’t want to be jealous when I see how you use somebody else in the body of Christ for Your glory. I want to rejoice in You and celebrate the different ways in which you use different people. I want my focus to be able to see Your Kingdom come on Earth as it is in heaven.

You know my place. You know where I stand and the ways in which I am yet to grow. May my desires always be in alignment with Yours. May I desire to receive honor only from you – to hear you say “Well done, good and faithful servant.” Keep reminding me that it is the only honor that is of lasting value. Thank you for teaching me Your will. You are my God; let Your good Spirit lead me on level ground (Psalm 143:10).

In Jesus’s name, Amen.