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June 26, 2017 · Leave a Comment

Battling Negative Thoughts: My Story

Overcoming Difficulty· Testimony

Battling Negative Thoughts: My StoryNegative thoughts often cling to my mind like a death grip. I’m particularly haunted by the lies of failure, unworthiness, and loneliness. This concerns some big areas of my life, or even the core of my very being. There’s a constant battle with these thoughts and what God’s truth reveals in His word.

One of the biggest areas is my role as a homemaker. This path wasn’t always destined to be for me. I spent six years in school to earn my Master’s Degree in Speech-Language Pathology. I was career oriented, and worked for almost five years in my field of expertise. It wasn’t until my seventh month of pregnancy that my husband and I decided it was more beneficial for me to stay home. Because of this, I often feel like a failure. Largely in student loan debt, I am not contributing to our family’s finances.

However, according to scripture I am a work of art- a showpiece of God’s creation.

For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.” Ephesians 2:10 (NLT)

There is no failure in a masterpiece. And I can rely on the promise that God is constantly at work within me, perfecting His masterpiece, until Jesus comes! (Philippians 1:6).

Another area is my role in relationships with others. I can be impatient, argumentative, and controlling. My husband naturally yields patience. Our child is pleasant and content in character. My family lends overwhelming support. My friends offer kindness, compliments, and praise. Thus, feelings of unworthiness take over my mind. How do I deserve to be surrounded by so much love when my personality can be sometimes unloving?

However, scripture affirms that my inner being is sacred, a dwelling place for the Holy of holies.

…For we are the temple of the living God. As God said: “I will live in them and walk among them. I will be their God, and they will be my people.” 2 Corinthians 6:16 (NLT)

God sees great worth in me. He trusts me with promised treasures in this temple, and I am to guard these by the Spirit that is within me (2 Timothy 1:14).

My role as a stay-at-home mommy is another effected area. The vast majority of my family and friends work a day shift job. Since having a young child, it is difficult for me to plan social visits with people in the evenings. My child follows an early bedtime routine, and changing that course could result in a challenging night’s rest. This tends to breed the feeling of loneliness. I often feel isolated, being cooped up in a house with minimal adult interaction.

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However, I am promised in scripture that I have an extended network of family.

See how very much our Father loves us, for he calls us his children, and that is what we are! 1 John 3:1 (NLT)

I have a heavenly Father who has promised to never leave or abandon me (Deutoronomy 31:6). And since I’m adopted into sonship through Jesus Christ, I have brothers and sisters in Christ (Ephesians 1:4-5), thus never being alone.

You see, it wouldn’t matter where I’m at in life, what I’m doing with my life, or who is in my life. Negative thoughts are constantly threatening to attack my mind. That’s because the enemy is always on the prowl, looking for whom he can destroy (1 Peter 5:8). And if I am not properly equipped to identify these lies, I would become victim to its destruction. And maybe you face this battle, too. But, there are beautiful truths given to us, by God’s word, to properly equip us! Praise be to God!

Friends, I pray that we daily take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ (2 Corinthians 10:5). I pray that God imparts to us wisdom, knowledge, and understanding of who He says we are (Proverbs 2:6). I pray that we live loved (1 John 4:16), because that is the most important essence of who we really are!

What negative thoughts are at battle in your mind? What truths from God’s word do you cling to in order to defeat the lies in your mind?

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Rachael McCloskey
Rachael McCloskey

I am a sheep who seeks and listens to her Shepherd’s voice. I blog to share of my personal experiences and correlate them to lessons I’ve learned from biblical principles. I want to offer a haven for readers to share their voice. I encourage people who are silent to speak against their inner persecutions.

sheeponcesilenced.com

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