Oops, I did it again. Like a stealth bomber, I zeroed in on his hand undetected. Specifically, his left hand. And there it was… On the fourth finger, indented into his skin from years of wear, was “the band”. The band that said, nope, this one’s not for you. Carry on.
I quickly shift my gaze in the opposite direction. My heart sinks momentarily as the flicker of hope vanishes. Hopelessness glides into its place.
I have been waiting for “Mr. Christian Right” for quite some time. In fact, these waiting room walls are closing in on me and I’m beginning to think he is never going to walk through the door. Or worse, he doesn’t exist. Or worse-worse, there’s something wrong with me!
Why is this taking so long? It seems everyone has someone, except me. And when exactly, did I become a left-hand ring-stalker?
When I found myself in the waiting room far longer than I expected, fear and doubt took up residence in my heart. Even though I had already learned God doesn’t want me to live my life in fear, I could easily slip back into that place from time to time. Sometimes I even dwelt there.
Wallowing in the waiting room one day, an old saying came to mind – “Blossom where you’re planted.” We may not be able to control the situation that put us in the “waiting room”, but we can control our response to it. Perhaps this is the time we’re supposed to be deeply focused on our children or finish that degree. Maybe that [fill in the blank] we’ve been putting off is calling our name.
Or perhaps, we’re not ready to receive what we are waiting on.
Maybe we’re in the waiting room to allow us time to do the hard work of letting go or holding on.
Or maybe we need to unpack some luggage from the past that is competing with the present.
We must be intentional in the wait or our time in the waiting room will be wasted. Time we will never, ever get back. When we acknowledge we are in this place, at this time, for a specific purpose, we can be free to wait without worry.
If we allow it, the waiting room can serve a useful purpose. The choice is ours. We can choose to wallow in doubt and self-pity; even become envious of friends who’ve been rescued from the waiting room. Or, we can be joyfully productive and growing in our purpose.
I started a singles small group in my home and took on a new role at work. Both were challenging, but the payoff always trumps the challenge. My house is full now with people who love me without exception. And my career has stretched me in ways I never thought possible.
Let’s choose to blossom where we’re planted. Joyfully. Not the easy choice; the better choice.
We might not see the purpose, but we can still be purposeful.
We can press on. We can help others, and we can help ourselves. We can wait knowing God will work all this out for our good and His glory.
Yes, the desire to find “Mr. Christian Right” is still there. And I keep an eye out for him in the background of my heart – a girl’s gotta be ready, right? But I’m okay with the wait. My heart is satisfied in this journey through singleness.
What are you waiting on? Are you tired of being in the waiting room?
There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven.” (Ecclesiastes 3:1)
A Song: The Waiting by Jamie Grace
A Read: What to Do Until Love Finds You by Michelle McKinney Hammond
Father, I don’t understand your ways. You are all knowing, but I am not. Help me turn the hopelessness into helpfulness. Take my waiting and turn it into something purposeful. Keep my heart full of Your wonder and grace so that my waiting is not a worry or a burden. But rather, let my waiting be fruitful to others and to myself. Amen.